Whether you are considering a new career change or a new relationship, making the right decision about a long-term commitment can mean the difference between an extended time full of misery and struggle or a time full of passion and development
Here are “8” tell-tale signs that the opportunity in front of you is not “THE ONE” :
1) You have to change who you are to make it work
When something or someone is meant for you, you can be yourself. You will feel inspired to be the best version of yourself, but who you are at your core will be an asset, not a liability. If you are trying to like things you do not like, or feel like your behavior or personality is constantly being criticized, this is not a good sign
2) You have to constantly prove your worth
When it is the right situation, the other person, whether he is your boss-to-be or your partner-to-be, will see a lot of the value of what you bring to the table. In fact, they may be excited about elements of you that even you take for granted. You will feel appreciated and valued. If you have to beg for appreciation or constantly have to convince someone of your worth, think twice about moving forward
3) In your heart, you know you are settling for less
If fear has you making excuses for why this situation could work even though it does not line up with the vision in your heart, slow down. Be honest with yourself. Why are you settling? Is it because your expectations really are unrealistic or inauthentic? Or is it because you’re afraid that you can’t have what you really want? Trust your fear. Fear is sometimes a natural reaction to moving closer to the truth
3) If another opportunity would come along, you would take it
When you find the right opportunity, you are not holding out hope for something better any more. If that’s not how you feel, you should definitely question whether this is the one
4) You don’t share the same values
Your core values guide your purpose, how you treat people, what work you do, how you work, and the vision that you have for what you want your life to look like. If the decision you are about to make forces you to work against some of those values, you may end up compromising too much of yourself to make it work
5) You are not at peace about it
What does your “gut instinct” tell you? Sometimes the most reliable indicator that you are on the right path is your intuition. Do you “feel” at peace about the decision, or does something simply feel “off”?
6) You are anxious and cannot sleep
Do you feel tense or start experiencing anxious, racing thoughts whenever you think about your decision? Are you losing sleep over it and wake up restless night after night? Your body can tell you a lot about whether you’re making the right decision. Find out what your body is trying to tell you !
7) You are not telling the whole truth
Keeping information about a decision you are about to make secret from those close to you could be a sign you are not OK with it. Lying is also often a sign you have not fully accepted a situation. It may also indicate you are not proud of your choice because if you were, wouldn’t you want to share it with those you love most? Of course there are exceptions, but always ask yourself if you are hiding to avoid someone else pointing out to you what you already know !
The key to making good decisions is to balance between following your heart (how you feel about it), your intuition (gut instinct), and listening to your head (logic and reason)
Although you can never be sure of all the future outcomes of a big decision, nor should you try to be, one thing is certain: Nothing is worse than remaining in a state of indecision.
One of the main objectives of the Play BIG! leadership program for women is to help you learn to trust your own instinct, body and heart, and make more courageous decisions towards your own happiness and success !